TESTS!!rarrr.

everything's coming all at one go!!argh.ive got 4 tests next week.namely:biology, economics, history, as wells as chinese.so techinically it's 3 tests.but who cares.it's still just as many.

this is so gonna be a mugging weekened.and i really dont like it.WHY??i like need to hand in my second draft for my econs IA, of which i really need to re-do, also.i suck.ive gotso much to study cos ive kinda come to the realisation that that though ive been listening really hard in classes, i dont really know anything.stupid me.

but im still happy.ive got nice PE shorts that most people dont have.ive got the full 30 points for NAPFA, for like the FIRST time in my life.ahahaha.our rugby guys beat SAJC.

there's a holiday next tuesday.yay(!) a mugging i shall go.

toodles~

muacks!

`mandalovesyou

you're so stupid and oblivious,you'll probably never realise how i really feel.even if you knew,it probably doesnt matter to you.im sorry for poking my nose into so many things.teach me to let go like you do.thank you.

homework update anyone?

ah ha!ive finished my mock IOP already.ahahahahaha.i am SOOOO happy.a lil' less stressed i guess.but BIOLOGY sucks my memory out of me.ahhh.i wish i were a computer.then i'll be able to store lotsa stuff in my brain (: i want to be a major infomation storage container.then i'll be a guaranteed 42-pointer.wheee.the thought of that excites me.

oh wait.how does an excited computer behave?hmmm.

this week has been pretty good.so many free periods.but somehow.ive been really drained.by i dont know what.for i dont know what as well.im confused.im suicidal too.lol.at a certain point of the week,wednesday i believe,i wanted to be knocked down by a car.a car that would come so stealthily i would not have heard it or have any time to react.BOOM!then i'd be at the hospital.either at the brink of death.or just injured.for that matter.i wonder why.maybe i want to find out whether people would visit me at the hospital or not.maybe i just want to take a break from school and i just need a legitimate reason to do so.maybe im just.suicidal.lol.

oh wells.back to studying i go.trigo confuses me.so hey hey BIO here come! (:

toodles~

muacks!

`mandalovesyou

maybe the inner nerd in me is really coming out.

ive come to a realisation after a brief conversation with an IB senior of mine that im not expected to be working hard as of yet.by right, im supposed to be partying and probably slack.i guess.well.apparently im not.ive finished my econs IA draft already.haha.but i havent done my mock IOP powerpoint yet.oh wells.ive not done the more urgent one yet.i feel really lazy.i'll do it later.i hope. (:

i borrowed tim gay's lu xun to do my mock IOP on friday hoping to complete it by last night but ive yet to touch it till now.and amazingly at 6pm today,i found my own lu xun. ((: wheee.guess i was meant to do it in the end.rarrr.ohhh.and i think tim gay has nice handwriting.it's cute. (: ahahaha.im high now.i just ate a lot.so im feeling bloated and fat.i think i'm gonna gain 2 kg.ahhh.i wish i were a kid now.then i can lose all the 'baby' fat when i kinda grow up and all.lol.im such a retard.maybe being emo is driving me crazy.

ive reached emo breaking point.i am no longer sad.which is good i guess.ive kinda lost touch with my emotions.dont know what im feeling now.dont know what to do with whatever happens around.i guess all i feel is high now.it's like im on drugs now.some chemical reaction in my body that 'creates' this drug in me.that numbs my everything.like anaesthesia for emotions.well at least im sane,depending on what you definition of sane actually i guess.haha.im really retarded.or i probably hope i am.then i wont understand anything,wont feel very much of anything,wont do very much about anything.be pretty happy and all cos everyone's attention is directed at me.yay(!)

all in all.i guess im happier now.let me help you if youre emo.please.i just really want to be someone you can relate to.emo sucks.but if you share it with me it wont suck half as much.really.smile at me would you. (:

toodles~

muacks!

`mandalovesyou

alternating the weeks.

im up.then im down.then when im finally up again, i hit rock bottom once again.i feel my lowest when emo peaks.ironic aint it.oh wells.im confusing myself like a RETARD.somehow,i wish i were really a dumb 'blonde'.at least i wouldnt think,let alone think too much.ha!wont life be much easier than.

i wonder why we need knowledge then.damn adam and eve for eating the forbidden fruit.lol.if they hadnt acquired knowledge we wouldnt have to spend money on clothes,we'd all b planting fruit trees,we wouldnt even havta worry much about anything else cos life is totally in place.rarrr.

i wish i never felt much emotions.i wish i had a higher threshold for receiving care and niceness.then i wouldnt be thinking so much.ahhh.i shall go emo now. (:

toodles~

muacks!

`mandalovesyou

camp resilience

first of all,i wanna say a HUGE THANK YOU to the whole EXCO as well as the campers.let me start off with the EXCO.you guys are the best man. (: we've been through so much s*** for this,got into confusions and all but we pulled it off!yay!ok maybe ive been a dumb 'blonde' at times but hey!you guys had fun teasing me alright.lol.oh my.im starting to miss you guys already.ahhh.we need to spend more McDonald's nights together.wheee.that was so fun.lol.sleeping on the benches there and having supper at 2am.lol.oh wells.i guess i just dont like staying at home.but still,i so agree that we've bonded so much during this whole event and i really hope our dynamics would be even better after this. (: well.once again,THANKS EXCO!

now on to the campers.HEY!you guys were the ones that this camp was planned for and i really want to thank all of those who attended this camp and participated actively.you guys are the bomb! (: really.thanks for enjoying the camp and i really hope that you guys would follow through with us.THANKS!

to everyone:this may be the first Camp Resilience, but i believe there'll be more to come and they'd be even better! (:

toodles~

muacks!

`mandalovesyou